Right, c'mere a wee second Jimmy. No, closer. Closer. Right, now, listen, I want
to tell you just a wee bit about 'The Glasgow Project'.

'The Glasgow Project' is an incredibly idealistic venture of mammoth
proportions to put it mildly. It is a real 'of the people for the people'
kind of a gig. It's ideology and philosophy are so incredibly pure and
simplistic that it might never happen. It might well be impossible for the
'project' to get off the ground never mind achieve its goals.

We're trying to make a film in Glasgow, about Glasgow using people who are
either in, around or willing to get to Glasgow. Those participating will
have to be inspired 'cause they aren't getting paid. Not a penny. Not a one.
Would anyone be stupid enough to do that today? Could something like that
happen in this cynical age? Ye never know. But you see if we can give a
bunch of people the opportunity to advance themselves a little bit in a
business they want to be in and they take that opportunity and do this thing
for nothing, the end product will be a film with a message of inspiration.
Even if it's complete and utter shite (the film I mean, not the message)
which incidentally it won't be, trust me. (Did I just say 'trust me'? Aw
man, how depressing is that?).

So that's our gig. Think we're mad? Maybe we are. Think we're joking? We're
serious as a heart attack. Think it'll happen?     Shhh, can you feel the
cynicism? Is that yours or mine? Tell you what, let's split it fifty/fifty.
(You can have the big half).

The parallax view from up here is amazing.

See, here's the deal James, we're from Glasgow. We have an innovative
concept in film making that will
blow their little socks off and it would be extremely foolish of anyone to
assume that they've even heard the half of it or that they know what we're
talkin' about yet. Or that they've heard the last of us. This is one for the
little guy.

This isn't a sales pitch or a teaser or a poke in the eye with a sharp
stick. It's a ray of hope and we hope that you'll let the odd one or two
(the odder the better probably) know about this as a possibility. We can
talk about the improbability later, after it's happened, when we can all be
armed to the teeth with hindsight.

Please excuse the tone of this e-mail but I've been listening to 'Les
Miserables' and you know how that can be.

Thanks for the timely response and the advice which is well sound and well
appreciated. G-Mac contacted me in the person of Cordelia Stevens. I look
forward to a continued dialogue with her and we'll see what happens.

I have a real problem on my hands here. You're absolutely right, who the
feck is going to devote their time, energy and expertise to a project when
the 'projecter' (I just made up a word) won't tell them feck all. But you
know what James, I'm gonna have to find a way because there's a whole
enigmatic characteristic to this project and that's one of the things that
makes it profoundly interesting. But only one of the things, there's loads
more. Obviously I'll have to afford some sort of explanations to people in
order to get them on board and for free but if it's to the point where we
lose that vital characteristic....

This little chicken (or is it an egg?) is operating on so many levels it's
mind boggling.

The wannabe is another vital component, without them it's just another
professional gig and you're right there's no shortage of them (the wannabes)
but I'd have to be completely out of my tree to attempt to make this thing
without the collaboration and support of a bunch of 'old salts' and I've
already got one or two which is encouraging. I need them for a ton of
reasons, not least of which is quality of end product. If this turns out to
be 'self-slicing-bread' as in, 'the greatest thing' since the other, what
fecking good is it if it's recorded on (I'll think of something really
clever to insert here in a minute [-try "Gaffer Tape" JM]) and edited by 'Mad Mental Quango' using his trusty open razor and wee dods of wrigley's Spearmint?

This is either the best thing to come out of Glasgow since the Proclaimers
or the worst career move of my life and please don't tell me the Proclaimers
aren't from Glasgow 'cause look where that leaves me. [-In Fife, actually, but then if you have to proclaim yourself….JM] But you know what James? I'll take my chances. I've already made the dubious decision to stick
my head above the parapet and don't think for two seconds that just because
people can't see my face yet there aren't snipers scoping out vantage points
as we speak. And they can all take their best shot. Cause let's face it,
it's only fair really...

.... that's what I'm doing.

To be continued...

Glasgow Boy.